a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
