i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
