I like my sex mixed with concussions.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
