reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize