I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
Randomize
