Tell her she can't have a vagina
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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