He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Randomize