i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
