Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
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