It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
