I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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