She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
Randomize
