My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Randomize
