Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
