It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
