Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Randomize
