honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
