My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
