but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
