Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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