she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
