wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
