thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Randomize