It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
it hurts more in the daytime
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
