Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize
