remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
My breasts were aching with rage.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
