so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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