Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
