so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize