.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Randomize
