After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
