i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
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