I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
