let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize