Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
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