I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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