What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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