The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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