I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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