I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
