Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I need to calm my uterus...
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize