so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
