dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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