id be glad to
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
This toilet bowl is my home.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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