what day is it and did you see me today?
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
