At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
