Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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