I'm really into asian looking animals
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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