Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Randomize
