You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Randomize
